The Sibylline Oracle (The Sibylline Trilogy) Page 15

  Valeria was stunned. “What else?”

  “Do you want to know more?” he asked.

  “I want to know everything.”

  “There’s a lot to know. Not all of it is pleasant.”

  “Show me.” She raised her hands out toward him, palms up.

  He brushed the side of her face and turned it so that she was looking into his eyes. He took both of her hands in his and the force she had felt with Mani began.

  Valeria saw herself as a young girl, similar to Mani’s memory, only from a different angle. She saw the little girl, herself, smiling at Alex. It was a special smile, implying they were secret friends. Valeria saw her own drowned face from Alex’s viewpoint; she heard his sobs and felt her own lifeless body. She saw Alex in a castle. She saw him battling the robed man, Aegemon, many times over. She saw herself in Alex’s arms in numerous memories, his hand, with his triangular tattoo, wrapped around her unconscious or dead body. The only things that changed were the clothes and locations.

  Finally, the visions stopped. Valeria felt a rush of intense emotion for Alex and, for the first time, understood why he treated her with such fragility.

  She wanted to move her mouth the short distance to his. She wanted to reach over and touch his face. Instead, she clung to his hands like a gift. His touch had a completely new level of emotional intensity to it, as if he now held nothing back. All of the years she had suffered, without love, no longer seemed to matter. For the first time, her heart felt as if it were overflowing, basking in the realization that he loved her. That he always had!

  A small laugh escaped as Valeria reached to brush away the joyful tears that threatened to spill over. “That letter…it was to me,” she whispered in astonishment.

  His thumb played across the top of her hands. She could see that there was still a hint of sadness in his eyes, of something left unsaid.

  “Alex, was I a true oracle?”

  “You are.”

  “But, sibyls or oracles have visions. I don’t have visions. And I’m certainly not immortal like you.”

  “We don’t really understand it.” Alex drew a breath. These were the questions he wasn’t prepared to confront yet. She would have to know the rest. But tonight, he had almost lost her again. Because of his fears, she had been hurt and had wanted to leave him. Distracted, Alex moved his hand to her knee. He did it smoothly and naturally and then felt the heat move through him. He swallowed and pulled his hand back.

  Alex needed to stay focused, especially over the next few days. Everything—her life, his life—rode on the precarious balance of his wits. He was inches from her mouth. The mouth he had spent a millennium dreaming of, painting, and carving; the mouth he had touched in stone and bronze and clay. Alex needed to feel the warmth of that beautiful, soft mouth responding to his. He could see the desire in her eyes and he knew that if he started now, they wouldn’t stop.

  With extraordinary effort, he forced himself to distance his face from hers. “Beautiful, the next few days are going to be…important. It would be better if we kept things…just…” He let out a deep sigh and then looked into her eyes. Valeria could see the fire again. Alex’s voice trembled with passion. “I could get lost in this.” He closed his eyes for a moment. “But I need to stay focused.”

  As she gave in to her absolute need to be closer, Valeria leaned her face against his chest, feeling Alex shudder. She moved her body against his and heard him say something unintelligible under his breath. Slowly, his arms went around her, pulling her in closer. She saw his eyes close and could hear his heart pounding—or was it her own?

  Valeria no longer wanted to be in control of her responses to him. But if she was going to keep from kissing him, she needed to think of something else. “Do I…reincarnate?”

  Appreciating the distraction, Alex gathered his control. He drew another deep breath and let it out slowly. “Well, it seems so.”

  He opened his eyes and glanced down at her. It was impossible not to smile. “You come back with different names…” He stroked her face. “But always you.”

  She longed to move her mouth to his neck. It was only inches away. But she knew it was important to Alex that they didn't let themselves get carried away. And for now, she would respect his wishes. She wasn’t quite certain how it worked when you wanted someone so desperately. Would they be able to just wait? With David, she never had this problem. Valeria’s mind careened back to reality; she was engaged to someone else. Perhaps that was what really held Alex back.

  “Is that how it works for people who aren’t oracles? Do all mortals reincarnate?”

  “I don’t really know.” He kissed the top of her head. “I only know about you.”

  Pulling her hand along his chest, she could feel the tension and absolute perfection in his form. All she could think was, Oh, my!

  “Thankfully, you keep coming back, time and time again. Though, I don’t ever know where you’ll be the next time. Caleb believes he is your compass. He believes that he can find you. Sometimes, he gets a general idea of your location, but sometimes he can’t.”

  “Caleb?” Valeria asked, surprised.

  “When he first found me, he told me he was going to help me find you. And when he isn’t distracted, as I’ve discovered twelve-year-old boys frequently are, he seems to be able to help.”

  Alex’s hand started to move down her spine, causing her heart to pound even harder and the heat to course through her again. Sensing her reaction to his careless slip, he dropped his hand and continued his thoughts instead. “As an oracle, we all have visions of the future. But for some reason most of my visions seem to be centered on you.” Alex shook his head. “Our visions aren’t as strong as they once were but we still receive the guidance we need.”

  She smiled. “What was it like…with us?”

  “Well, you don’t make it easy for a guy,” he teased, the firelight reflecting in eyes. “And, I should tell you,” he said as his mouth curved in a playful smile. “You do have the most frustrating propensity for royal families that I will…” He closed his eyes and shook his head. “Never understand.” They both laughed quietly.

  “Well, not this time!”

  “Evidently not.” Alex’s face got serious again. “I wish my visions had helped you more. But the problem is that they rarely tell me where you are. I have to concentrate and hope there are enough details to determine the time and location.”

  Valeria sighed as the side of her mouth touched his chest and she felt his heart thunder. “You did save my life!”

  Alex nodded, though he still seemed upset. “This one was easy—Central Park, the street signs, and the time of year.” He paused. “It’s earlier that I was referring to.”

  Unable to restrain the flinch, she said, “Your visions of me…they were only when my life was actually threatened? Or, how does that work?” She bit her lip, uncertain she wanted the answer.

  “It seems to be my lot in life to mostly see your challenges.” Alex looked away and shut his eyes for just a moment as if blocking out a painful memory. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you then.”

  “I don’t know what you mean,” Valeria lied again.

  “I searched everywhere for you, trying to find that white house with the green trim,” he said, his voice ringing with torment.

  She buried her face back in his chest. This time her thundering heart wasn’t from his closeness. “Alex, please tell me you didn’t see that!”

  Recognizing his error immediately, he pulled her in tightly, unable to get her close enough. “I’m sorry, “he sighed and shook his head, “I shouldn’t have said anything.”

  Feeling an old wound rising, she closed her eyes and slowly inhaled. “Really, it wasn’t that big of a deal,” she said in an attempt to dismiss the incident. “It isn’t like they...I stopped it. Nothing happened. Really, it was nothing.” She pushed off from his chest and looked away with sudden panic. “You didn’t...see it all?” she said as the details rolle
d through her head. She turned to him. “Alex, you didn’t, did you?”

  “I saw their intentions and that was enough,” he lied. Then, he stroked her hair and pulled her back into his arms. “Those kids…they did worse than harm you physically. They betrayed your sweetness and your trust.”

  “It was my own fault that things went as far as they did,” Valeria admitted. “The boy told me all I had to do was cry and they would stop.” She whispered, “A normal person would have cried. I don’t know why, I just couldn’t...bring myself...to let them have that.”

  He kissed her forehead. “I wanted to be there—your father should have been!” She felt his body shake as he met her eyes.

  “Yeah, well, Dad was never one for noticing fine details.”

  His jaw clenched. “Like the fact that his twelve-year-old daughter was wandering down a busy street lost and covered in mud? It was as if he didn’t even see you.” He turned his head as he thought about the father that never knew the precious gift of his daughter. “How could he not see you?” Valeria gave a nervous laugh. She didn’t want to be talking about this right now…or ever.

  “That’s why my visions are both a gift and a curse. I haven’t always been able to protect you.” He ran his hand through his hair. “But I swear, whatever I have to do, I won’t let anyone hurt you ever again.”

  She felt her pain shift, lessening under the weight of something much stronger. She ran a hand along the tense curve of his jaw. God, she did love him!

  “I don’t really think that life is like that,” she said. “I remember reading a quote by Emerson, ‘For everything you have missed you have gained something else’. I’ve always believed that. And I’ve always felt that hurt and happiness were interlinked. I don’t know that you can know one without having known the other.” Valeria paused, searching for a way to do justice to these new feelings. “The difference for me is that the pain will always be less now,” she said. “Because I know that there’s someone who loves me...because I know that you love me.”

  He brushed his face along the top of her head and whispered, “That I do, beautiful.”

  With his arms around her, she could forget everything else. “Tell me about a good vision you had.”

  “Well, there was one particular vision,” Alex answered softly as his eyes lit in a magical reverie. “It was one of my first visions of us. I had a wonderful childhood here at Morgana. But this vision is what gave me my concept of happy.”

  “Like now?” Valeria snuggled into his arms.

  “Kind of.”

  When he didn’t say more, she glanced up at him. He was looking past her into the fire, as if gratefully consumed by this particular memory. Sensing her puzzled gaze, he shook his head to curtail the vision.

  “How many life times have we...been together?”

  Alex flinched. “We… haven’t been.”

  “I don’t understand, Alex. You have found me before—obviously from those paintings and sculptures. But we weren’t...”

  He shook his head as he ran his fingers through the back of her hair. “I’ve never known whether that vision of us together was in the future...or just a fantasy.” He kissed the top of her head. “But I have to believe that it is yet to come.”

  She took a moment to digest what he’d said. “Well, we’re together now. So we can make it a reality.” She noticed that his arms suddenly tensed before his fingers returned to their play with a long curl of her hair.

  She wanted to hear him talk. “So, how did you happen to save me in New York? I get that it was not the first time you’ve spared me from death.”

  “New York? That was really nothing. I saw that vision…” Alex looked up to calculate. “I guess it was almost three years ago. It was obviously Manhattan. I recognized Central Park. I knew it was fall. I knew it hadn’t happened yet. So, I took a fall teaching schedule each year at Columbia to give me something to do. I knew you had to live in the area. I waited for you every day at that intersection for at least a few hours.”

  “You were there every day for three years?” Valeria asked.

  “No. Not every day…” Alex offered a conceding smile. “Well, yes, I guess I was there every day. The rest of the time I walked the streets where I saw you coming from, hoping to see you.”

  She found herself drifting off to the soothing sound of his voice. She didn’t want to move. She didn’t want to sleep and miss a moment with him. But she closed her eyes, listening to his heart beat, and fell into a deep, restful slumber. For the first time in several days, Alex let himself sleep, too. But while Valeria dreamt of having his arms around her and of their future, Alex was dreaming of the past.

  CHAPTER 15

  Florence, Italy 1898

  Alex raised his arm to bid at the auction. He was there to purchase a few more pieces of the Limoges that had belonged to her. The bids had been raised beyond what he had hoped to spend. But what was money if he could not allow himself this eccentricity.

  Besides, doing so helped him bide his time until the next vision would steer him toward her. Perhaps this time it would arrive in time for him to save her. No, not perhaps! This time he would save her. He had waited over a hundred years since his last vision of her. He wondered how much longer it would be until hope again filled his heart.

  Despite the eons, he had absolute certainty that someday she would be at Morgana, and that was his overriding passion. He often recalled that Myrdd’s had told Alex that he would not have been given the visions if there was no opportunity to change them. Although he had perhaps saved her a few times from the fate in his visions, he had no way of knowing if the illness or accident would have killed her without his intervention.

  His visions had been given to him by Apollo. But Alex knew that no god could be so cruel as to give him visions without the opportunity to change them. Alex had to believe that within the visions was a key to the insanity that was their life. Otherwise, Apollo, in granting him the visions and immortality had only damned him to a living hell.

  Mani had needed to remind Alex of Apollo’s kindness the the last time Alex had found her. He had arrived on time, but had been unable to change the fates. The French Revolution was not a safe place for royalty or the educated. For Alex, the guillotine had been only a short and even welcomed distraction from his pain. The guillotine was thankfully not his Prima Mortis and he had recovered soon enough. But knowing that his beloved—then only a child—had suffered the same treatment had been excruciating. And, for her, the results had been more permanent.

  Raising his hand to finalize the high bid, Alex pitied his competitors. No one could outbid him forever on an object he desired. He merely had to be patient. But patience was Alex’s downfall as Daphne had so aptly pointed out. Although he was not known for extravagance in his lifestyle, his bids did tend to get ostentatious. He didn't believe in playing a game simply to satisfy the masses. The fact was that Alex had unlimited resources, including the most important one of all: time. He had all the time in the world to get what he needed and wanted. Still, he did feel a bit of pity for those whom he outbid; they could never win against him.

  Doubling the current bid, and already bored, he sensed the flickering in his vision before it actually began. He thanked whatever source might have given him the gift of opportunity and hope. He stepped into the aisle before the winning bid was actually announced. He threw down his entire purse to the officials, along with a calling card and the address where to ship the Limoges bowls.

  He had mere minutes before his eyes would no longer be able to guide him. He knew from experience that mortals tended to misconstrue his response to the visions as madness; and they were right to some degree. It was best if he were alone.

  Finding an unoccupied alley, he leaned against the wall as the kaleidoscope effect continued from the outer edges of his sight and then slowly obscured it all. He took a deep breath, ready to recall every detail of the vision. Even the smallest fact could save her life!

  He
noticed a muddied street and a park. The leaves on the trees were the ripe green of early spring. The vision expanded, revealing the park’s riverfront. There were small twinkling lights and an orchestra playing a new kind of music. Alex memorized the tune. Then, she stepped out from the crowd. Involuntarily, he let out a small cry.

  She wore her brown hair full and fastened in a bun, as was the newest style. Small tendrils escaped along her face and neck. She took the arm of a man and laughed fully and richly, warming Alex’s soul. Her gown was low on the breast with very large sleeves. Alex had seen that trend in Paris Haute Couture. Since the bustles had gotten smaller, the sleeves had gotten larger.

  Fashion timeframes were easy to trace, especially when they changed so rapidly. Alex guessed she was young, probably nineteen or twenty. The man whose arm she held was tall and lean and at least twenty years her senior. Something in the leer of the man’s eyes made Alex wary.

  His vision expanded again and he dropped to his knees in thanks; there was a view of the white obelisk, the Washington Monument, the tallest structure in the world other than the newly constructed Eiffel Tower.

  After identifying a location and approximate date, he needed details about how she would be harmed. He watched as the man led her off the curb and into the road, and then turned to attend to their buggy. Alex had heard the man call her “Jenni.”

  As another couple stepped into a carriage, their horse reared. Jenni was distracted when someone called out from behind her. She turned to see the man in the other buggy trying to whip his horse into obedience. The horse reared in response, and all Jenni could do was watch as its hooves came flying down toward her.

  “Oh, no! No! No!” Alex cried, raising his arms as if to stop the horse and wishing he had the power to avert his eyes. He watched in horror as she fought to move out from under the horse’s hooves. The horse’s owner continued to whip the horse causing further trampling. At last, the horse was yanked away, but Jenni’s body was already bloodied and beaten beyond survival, her eyes frozen and staring off blankly.